“You can’t pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself first.” For my last Higher Living column, I want to bring up the topic of self-care, which is a form of self-love. I cannot begin to tell you how many of my clients have come to me depleted. The biggest reason is that they don’t take enough time for themselves because they’re too busy putting everyone else first. Doing for others is wonderful. But let me ask you this. Would you feel better about doing for others when you’re feeling refreshed and filled with positive energy, or when you’re dragging yourself while operating on what I call “depleted love fumes”? The thing is, we cannot condemn those who allow us to overdo for them, as some of “them” are little kids. Nor can we condemn those who take advantage of us, as we’re the ones giving them permission. We’re the ones making the choice to keep over-going and over-doing for others and neglecting ourselves. This is what then causes the body and spirit to break down where the undesirable feelings of anger and resentment start trickling in. But it doesn’t have to get to that point. Regarding that cup mentioned in above quote, there is a way you can feel good about helping yourself first before you help others. That is, by knowing you can serve others much more effectively and efficiently when you’re in a more positive and healthier state of energy in all categories.
There are people who subconsciously or consciously make themselves sick so they can finally have a break from being “non-stop.” This helps them feel less guilty about finally taking care of themselves. This may sound silly to some, but these are the desperate measures people find themselves taking, because they just can’t bring themselves to say yes to helping themselves first.
Additionally, after many thousands of sessions, I’ve found that it’s more female clients who have come to me who allow all the above to happen. Can it be from years ago when women stayed home and had the full-time job of taking care of the household and children? And so the habit of over-doing for everyone and putting themselves last, just continued on? Sure, why not, it makes sense. But of course there are other reasons too. But instead of listing them, I’d rather provide an Ancestral Energy Clearing that will make it pretty clear what some of those reasons are, and hopefully help resolve some of them.
Let’s get started. Be sure to be in a stationary position. This energy clearing is “prayer-like.” So please skip to the end if you’re not into that kind of thing:
“Infinite Creator, all that You are; For me, my family, our entire lineage, and all our relationships throughout all time- past, present and future: For all the times we felt unloved, unwanted, unsafe, invisible, ignored, dismissed, disrespected, rejected, excluded, forgotten, taken advantage of, taken for granted, deprived, neglected or abused. Please help us forgive each other and forgive ourselves please and thank you. For the times we felt we weren’t good enough; times we had to earn our value in our family and relationships; times we felt we failed others and ourselves; times others failed us. For all deep hurts, let downs and disappointments; times we overdid for others even if it meant neglecting ourselves where resentment built up as a result; times we struggled to say no; times we were people pleasers and depended on the approval of others. Please help us forgive each other and forgive ourselves please and thank you. For the times we put everyone first because that’s what our mothers did, and that’s what we were taught directly or from observation. For the times we had to become the parent at a young age because our parents weren’t fully present for whatever reason. For the times there wasn’t nurturing, love and support. For all lies, deceit, betrayal and dishonesty; times we were overly cautious. Please help us forgive each other and forgive ourselves please and thank you. For all criticism, condemnation, judgment, jealousy, anger, abandonment, and depression; times we felt let down by life and you Infinite Creator. For the times we didn’t own our power; times we didn’t go with our intuition; times we made choices that went against our heart, please help us forgive each other and forgive ourselves please and thank you. For the times we were attacked, blamed, judged, misunderstood; for all lack of communication; times we were passive. For all swallowed anger, unspoken words; times we felt no one heard us; times we felt we didn’t matter. For the times we no longer wanted to be here; times we had enough of life. Please help us forgive each other and forgive ourselves please and thank you. Infinite Creator, for the Highest good, please lift all pain, sin, self-neglect, negativity, burden, unworthiness, disappointment, abandonment, loneliness, fear, and all limitations. Please transform them into your love, and allow your love to flow back into all of us, giving and filling us with your love, harmony and peace, now and forever, please and thank you. Please help us to feel at peace with each other and with ourselves completely and forever, please and thank you.”
After repeating this clearing often and adding some nice positive affirmations, you should see a nice healthy balance between serving others and yourself emerging. And instead of resentment, your heart will feel love and you’ll start to feel better about life. Try it out and let me know how it goes. Much love! ~♥
Donnarose Melvin is an Ancestral Energy Clearing/Healing Intuitive whose pleasure it is to serve clients worldwide. Her knowledge from her advanced practitioner trainings in Ancestral Energy Clearing, and her BA degree in Psychology, along with her natural born intuitive gifts, have helped many achieve increased peace and happiness. Please send any inquiries or comments to: Donnarose1010@gmail.com ~ If you’d like an ancestral energy clearing/healing, please contact Donnarose at the email address above.